I was tired. I took off my shirt and pants – sleep ready. I laid in the bed and turned facing the door and away from the bathroom in an effort to fall asleep without thinking about the lady in there. What was she doing here? Who or what had caused the pain she showed? Would she tell me? Did I really care to know?
I snickered privately at that last thought. Lying in that bed, I was already feeling better; like a phone on low battery might feel when it is connected to its charger. I had almost already fallen asleep when she came out of the bathroom, towel-clad. I know because she went and checked the door, locked it. Then she came, lay on the bed and covered herself. For some reason I covered the same blanket.
She whispered throatily,
“Why do I suffer so? Why do my tears flow?
With an arm drawn close, with the other dealt a blow
When men say they love, is it all a live show?
Your thoughts on this, I really want to know.
For I give my soul, to the I adore
The fun I wrought was the stuff of lore
Yet beyond flesh he mauled and left me the whore.
My pride though torn from me he tore more.
I felt so bad for her. I turned to face her. Her tears shed anew had already begun to soak the pillow. I couldn’t bear it. I reached across and over her and switched off the light throwing the room into semi-darkness. The only light was coming from the corridor outside the door. I could smell the hotel shampoo she had washed her hair with, which mixed with her natural scent probably because she didn’t use much shampoo.
She was cold. Instinctively I held her and she did not push me away. For a moment, I let my warmth envelope her and felt the shudder of her tears. I whispered in – what I believed – comfort,
“Men are mostly blind as mute bats and imperfect.
They hardly know what is wise to protect.
It is his loss that he is without;
You, are worthy beyond a good doubt.
Her breath cascaded down my chest in steamy regular intervals. Her right held us in a gentle embrace.
“What then is needed? Who then is safe?
I want to love and be loved in return
Because lonely is sad and ‘couple’ is not safe.
I ask, to whom and where do I turn?
Am I a frog; hopping ugliness
Or like a tree, solitary commonness?
What is my fault and how can I help it?
If only I may find a ring and a pulpit.”
‘A ring and a pulpit’, my thoughts echoed silently. While she wished more of that, I wished less of it. If I had never married Dew, I would be faultless in making sweet, comforting love to this angel. I bulged greedily as she said the words, ‘I want to love and be loved in return,’ but I replied as clear-headedly as I could,
“Only GOD is needed, only he can save.
His love though immortal we ignore him and die.
I see your beauty and sense you’re brave.
The more you seek him, the lesser you’ll sigh.
You are a wonder, a graceful dragon,
Let men covet as they gaze on.
Yet you don’t know your worth
But that is not your fault.
She trembled all over as I said that. My body reacted lustfully. She was warmer now and very soft – I noticed. I extended rigidly and prodded at her thighs lightly. I jerked my waist and butt back awkwardly to avoid her noticing my erection. She gasped and I knew she knew.
To my surprise – somewhat pleasant surprise – she stayed put for a few moments later. Then she released me from her embrace and looked into my eyes,
“Like good wine proud in its age
Your words taste like truth and comfort.
Why are you then a single sage?
To whom is made salacious report?
I must have blushed, but it was dark and no one will ever know. I felt a tad embarrassed but my erection painfully reminded me its urgent intentions.
I said,
“I have explained my cause and matter,
I have, more times than I wish to number.
Forgive my disrespectful rod
It is unruly, its desires are absurd.”
She cringed. I immediately regretted my hurried reply. What would I do?
Oh well, I thought, it was fun while it lasted. She had her head on my left arm even though we were not in that cozy embrace any longer. I half-rolled away from her into the best position I could without asking her to free my arm.
She began to sob again. That ‘my-life-is-a-rainy-day’ sobbing I couldn’t bear. I drew closer to her again and she shifted into me as well, embracing me and sobbing into my chest. My erection was still there.
Her lips found my right nipple and wet with hot tears my nipple prophesied against my last restraint. She sucked on it and my hand infiltrated her panty and squeezed.
There was no space between us. I was on fire, pulsing with need. She clasped her thighs around me and I rolled unto my back with her on top of me.
My ‘evil side’ said’
“This is the answer, to unite with desire
Like a Pride that is lazy with power
Your instincts are to kill the hunger,
Throw caution to its death and plunder.”
“What of your lost bride?
How this will dash her pride.
Will you not hear her side?
Think before you eat outside.”
I thought these things as she sucked my nipples, one after the other after the other. My erection throbbed hot under her belly. I was losing my grip, while my thoughts still battled,
“Is everything not a game and I been cheated?
Where is Dew and in whose company is she seated?
But here is pain that asks my pleasure;
Should we not fly as birds fleeing closure?
I woke up like a man’s head breaks the surface of calm water in his quest for air. She had kissed her way down my flat belly with her hands on the sides of my hips.
I grabbed her shoulder and pushed her backwards. I curled my legs away from her and said,
“I will not eat of this regret
Nor betray myself for lust I just met.
GOD will forgive my present blunder
As long as I commit no further.
She was dripping with readiness and heaving with surprise. Anger flickered across her features so quickly; the hurt that now sat on her face made the anger seem like my imagination was playing video games. While I tried to fight myself from rushing over to her and apologizing with kisses and probing fingers, thoughts of what to and not to do with her lingerie clad body for the rest of the night. She moaned terribly saying,
“Again am rejected on the eve of climax,
Sins against me burn with male sparks.
Though it is release I expect,
Here I kneel; an abandoned project”.
I imploded with sadness,
“I too am abandoned, my wife is gone,
But I am yet no heart of stone.
Disrespecting us would be fun,
But look how close we’ve grown.”
She stared at me for a long moment, like a buyer appraising a product. I dodged her eyes by bowing my head. I still had my body to contend with. We both sat there on the bed frozen in seeming uncertainty, the next thing happened. There was a knock on the door and to my mild surprise, she got off the bed and opened the door as near-naked as she was.
The lady who was my previous roommate stood at the threshold. I was flabbergasted.
She shot me a hateful look and said to my room-mate,
“The Founder wants to meet,
Noah’s test is thus complete.
Get up with every wit
It is time to fill the pit.”